Rituals and Relaxation

The rituals of LMB and bedtime are proving to be more of a giggle on a daily basis.

Ever since the children were a few months old, Mr Beehive and myself have accustomed them to some kind of routine - generally of the guise: Bath, Books, Boob/Bottle, Bed......almost the three R's eh?

As they are getting older, the books have gone from being separately read in each child's room to a rather stunning move to a "family reader" (our current read being Pinnochio), but really, I am digressing.

Each of my kids has had their own "spinning it out" techniques and Little Miss Beehive, is proving no exeption to that rule.

Her latest is to ensure we have the light on outside her room (despite her having the door closed because she likes it dark!) and then following up not ten seconds later with opening her door and just standing there.

One of us then, naturally hears her and will go up to ask what is the matter. She will then cock her head to one side (which, if you could see her this evening in her brand new yellow Snow White nightdress and finally growing and thickening blonde hair - just perfects this picture of Marmalade Atkins crossed with Pinkalicious!) and close her eyes and start......everytime the same way.

LMB " Errrmmmmmmmmm"

Irritated parent "Yeess??"

LMB "Eeerrrrrmmmmmmmm...........when I go to bed.....................errrr....errmmmmm.... I don't shut my eyes *tee hee, titter titter*" (she does find herself incredibly witty and amusing!)

Irritated Parent "Okay, that's nice - go to bed please."

and that is it, no fuss, no argument, she just has to tell someone!!!



Tonight I had:

"Errrrmmmmm"

"Yeeesss?"

"Eeerrrrrmmmm.......*thinks*....my wardrobe."

"Okay, your wardrobe?"

"*tee hee, titter titter* My wardrobe is not nice, I don't like it, it scares me.....*more titter titter!" (she then looks at me from her cock-eyed view and grins)

"Okay, well we'll deal with that in the morning - now go to bed!

Problem solved..........




Only not, because it is a built in wardrobe!!!!!


Her other ritual is to migrate, every night, from her room, to ours. When she was small, it was okay, nice to cuddle up to her hot body. Now she is a large nearly 3 and a half year old, this hot body is rather squirmy and loves to come between myself and Mr Beehive and not to mention sleep diagonally. So thus, we have set her up with a matress on the floor to which she dutifully comes in, lays down, pulls up the covers and goes back to sleep............................................



.................................until the morning - What are you complaining about I hear you cry?

But the problem is not really her early rising or migration - it is the "watching".

From around 5.45 most mornings I am no longer awoken by babies crying, birds singing, alarm clocks going off or even Mr Beehive getting up for work. Instead I am awoken by a presence.

It stands watching, nothing else, not poking, touching or even talking. It is silent, still, observant - just watching me from around 8 inches from my face.

It scares the living crap out of me, without fail, ever frickin' morning.




I just gotta get her out of THAT ritual!

Babies, Boys, Buses and Blue Icing!!!

Okay, so I am seriously out of it dude!!

Today Master Beehive the elder had his party for his birthday. He had chosen to take a couple of friends out to the Sushi restaurant and then afterwards come back for cake and a movie. As we drove to the restaurant his two friends began talking to each other about the latest Pokemon games that they have. We are a pretty un-techy household (in fact, I am currently typing this blog entry on a buy that has taken somewhat three years to convince ourselves of the usefulness of - a laptop) and thus far haven't really had any reason to change that. However, listening to these two, one eight years old, one just seven, I realised that the whole language was different. I can honestly say that I had no clue what they were talking about and in all honesty, couldn't even make sense of what they were saying.

"Dude, what's the HP damage on your Itrabobby"

"Aw Man, it's awesome, there are 650 danger knots"

"Aw dude, that sucks!"

"Yeah! It sucks, but then it's cool, the right phelange is connected to the left phelange which in turn rotates the 769 whingamadoodle and stops the kratchewatche from blasting the mingymongy, and I am up to level 45!"

" Cool man! Awwwwwweeeessoooooome!"

What the F(*&*(*&***?????

I had obviously left my street cred back in 1984!

The return journey on the other hand, if you can add a couple of glasses of coke, some sugar and blue icing and it was truly incomprehensible and at twice the speed and volume too.

I suppose it wasn't helped by the fact that I only got in this morning at 1am after the second birth this week. It's somewhat like waiting for a number eleven at the moment. You wait weeks, then suddenly two come along at once. The first was Sunday night through Monday night and then yesterday morning I was called away to the next one which got me back early this morning. I was then supposed to be doing post partum work with the first couple at 9am - so strangely enough I am somewhat flagging right now.

The births were long and tough on the mamas involved. But how opposite could they be.
Birth one was a big big boy delivered by c-section eventually as he started to cause his mama's cervix to swell up and Birth two was a teeny tiny girl who was a VBAC, much to her mama's delight and relief.


So, all party guests are present and correct and quietly (now!) watching Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - Ah well, I bet they don't know qwerty or who Gene Wilder is!!

Hmmm now where is that blue icing?..........

Boobie cases and the LBD!

You know, internet shopping is both a blessing and an absolute pain in the butt!

This weekend I have been excitedly awaiting the arrival of a new dress that I ordered on line for our school auction party in mid May.

I tirelessly (oh ho ho!) trawled the net looking for the LBD - only I was happy with it not being Black. Thinking my luck was in with a sort of halter necked type that claimed to "hang beautifully" - I ordered it in both my regular size and the size below (yeah, I know I can't luck in twice in one session!) plus the perfect set of matching shoes.

When the dratted thing arrived, the material, which wasn't evident from the regular pics, the zoom in pic, or the size 0 model smiling smugly wearing the LBD, clung to all my wobbly bits. The muffin top was leaking into the fabric and in all honesty..........I was scared. I know I still have a month and that is four more weeks of no chocolate, lots of Special K, 300 gallons of water, at least 20miles of X training and 500 hours of Pilates, but this would have to have been nowt short of a small miracle or liposuction to reach the cling free six pack that the dress really demanded.

So today I decided to send Mr Beehive back to the local store to return said item whilst I took Master Beehive the younger with me to another large department store to try to find one of around a dozen dresses I had found on line, but wasn't risking anything short of physical fitting this time!

Unfortunately what the small print didn't tell me was that the likelyhood of finding even one of anything I see online in the store is pretty much zero. The shop assistant scanned my printed off "wish list" only to return it to me with the information that normally what is online isn't carried in the store (*rolling eyes emoticon here*) and the only way to try stuff is to buy it in several sizes and send back what doesn't fit..............okay! Thanks for that info........exactly what I was in there to avoid! (*double rolling eyes emoticon here*)

Still, as we had arrived at the mall at least half an hour before opening, Master Beehive and I had done our fair share of window shopping by this point and had noticed one or two other stores with some potential.

Now there is one really extra special quality about Master Beehive the younger that needs to be known outside his family, Master Beehive the younger is going to be the BEST catch EVER!

He has a real natural eye for fashion, tells it how it is, (you won't catch HIM beating around the bush - if your bum looks big......he'll tell ya and mean it, none of this reading between the lines malarky with him!) and his ability to sit and wait patiently, without huffing and sighing, whilst the woman in his life tries on half a dozen dresses is truly tremendous for a five year old!

So, he sits outside the fitting room in a comfy chair reading the latest issue of "Bridge for Beginners and Bored Housewives" whilst I try on several different dresses; halter neck, strapless, sateen, linen, plain, patterned, white and black, black and white, more black than black and more white than......well.....white! As you can see, the colour idea got flushed down the swanny fairly rapidly and I guess being in the shop "White House/Black Market" had already limited our colour options somewhat!!

After narrowing down my shortlist to two, I thought I would ask his opinion on them.

He was more than happy to oblige and leaving his post and come in behind the curtain.

If you know my boyo, you know that he has two volumes in life: Very Loud and Ridiculously, unbelievably, people-can-hear-you-in-the-next-shop-despite-the-music-being-on-full-volume-Loud

Then in his best "I-know-I-am-cute-and-am-about-to-say-something-I-know-is-cheeky-and-funny-but-you-won't-tell-me-off-cos-I-am-so-cute." ridiculously, unbelievably, people-can-hear-you-in-the-next-shop-despite-the-music-being-on-full-volume-Loud Voice, he pokes his head around the curtain and exclaims with "oh such indignance"....

"Why is your boobie case on the floor mama?"

You could hear the sniggers.

Fortunately I am so used to these outbursts that I was able to leave the changing room with my head held high and engage in banter with the shop assistant whilst purchasing the best of the two lovely frocks.

So all being well, boobies and muffin top safely encased, and no doubt checked for their stay-put-ability by my son, I will be able to enjoy auction night!!

The first cut is the deepest.......

.........and causes the most likelyhood of bald patches!


So what can I expect from my kids and peer pressure in the future??

Well if today is anything to go by - I expect they will bow to it as much as I tried to (well, I liked to call it "rebelling against my parents" but in all truth it was probably succumbing to peer pressure -yawn!)

This weekend, Master Beehive the younger's bezzy mate was unwittingly handed over to his father's capable hands for a quick trim at the barbers......kind of male bonding one presumes lol! However, this resulted in a number 2 army crew cut and probably a close call on the divorce front too!!

So, this evening, Master Beehive the younger commented on how much he liked his friend's new cut.

"That's nice!" I replied with my mind on other things


"I want mine cut like that" says he


"Sure sweetie, we'll just let it go through the summer, like we agreed, and then have it cut in the Fall." This was actually partly a ploy on my part to hope he changed his mind and also because he changes his mind on a weekly basis like the wind.

After dinner I pop upstairs to get the Little Miss's p-j's and shut curtains - the usual routine. Getting sidetracked I probably end up being upstairs for a good 15 minutes.





On returning to the kitchen, I notice there is a smallish but long pile of hair on the floor. Not thinking TOO much of it, I pick it up and open the trash to put it in, only to discover at least four more handfuls.

It is funny how, when faced head on with a situation, the dawning of reality comes in slow motion. Eventually the mallet hits me on the head and I put two and two together.

He had scalped the back of his head and taken his bangs so high they would have made Bjork proud! I had to do a repair job and there was only one way forward and at 7pm at night, there are no hairdressers open for the challenge except chez moi!.....................

So I am now, very sad, mourning the loss of his wonderful angelic mop......................





From this:

To this.........................

Is it cos I is.......

a cheeky cockney Londoner guv??

So firstly:

What IS it with the letter H in the English language?

UK:

Since when has an H been a Hay-tch?? As far as I ever knew it was Aitch. Perhaps, in my inferior knowledge, it is just part of the estate agent training manual, because in all, yes ALL, my communication with them over the last couple of weeks, every darned one has pronounced aitch the same way and the lilt on the hAYtch is nauseating!!!! Perhaps there is a secret Estate Agent school where they practice the accent...........or perhaps I should be looking for a house in Scotland??

US:
And then on the other side of the pond there is a complete dismissal of the fact that H in front of a word, generally makes the sound "hu" so Hotel, Herb, Happy, Hungry. For the majority of words on pages 486 - 685 of my dictionary the H is not silent, nor do my American friends pronouce it as such until I am offered a cup of "Erbal tea" or asked what "Erbs" I put in the casserole? !!!!!

And then there is this...................


Cabinet for girl who wanted 'Cab, innit?'
A teenager reportedly ended up with a cabinet instead of a taxi because she asked directory inquiries for a "cab, innit".
According to The Sun, the Londoner, 19, wanted a taxi to take her to Bristol airport, and first used the Cockney rhyming slang "Joe Baxi".
When the operator told her she couldn't find anyone by that name, the teen replied: "It ain't a person, it's a cab, innit."
The operator then found the nearest cabinet shop, Displaysense, and put the girl through.
She then spoke to a bemused saleswoman and eventually demanded: "Look love, how hard is it? All I want is your cheapest cab, innit. I need it for 10am. How much is it?"
The sales adviser said it would be £180 and the girl gave her address and paid with a credit card. The next morning, an office cabinet was delivered to her South London home.
The firm, of Bishop's Stretford, Hers, has now apologised and refunded her cash after the mix-up two weeks ago.
Marketing manager Steve Whittle said: "We thought it was a joke at first but the girl was absolutely livid. We have suggested that maybe she should speak a bit clearer on the phone."


Do I laugh, do I cry...............or per'aps it is cos I is a snob..............innit??!

Never enough sisters.......

It has been the strangest of times in the Beehive recently. Lots of high running emotions. Today we found out that the baby had Trisomy 16, which was why I miscarried as it is incompatible with life. Not sure how I feel about that right now, I am not sure if it is better to know these things or not, there isn't exactly anything I can do with that information right now.

My little sis has been here for the last week, which has been one of the best tonics a girl can have! She was childless for the week, so we were able to coordinate trips out and on Friday evening we both spent a stunning time at an overnight party at the house of a brother of some ladies I know from school. It was a great night. The home was, in all honesty, like a hotel/spa. There was a huge indoor swimming pool, hot tub, gym, sauna, yoga room etc. These two sisters had laid on an event for the auction last year that consisted of a party and sleep over at this "ranch"! There were around 30 ladies in all and what with learning some of the most sordid and classified secrets of my school-mom *sisters* and swimming in what can only be defined as bath water after probably having more cosmopolitans than is truly safe for swimming *ooops*! I do feel somewhat refreshed and ready to get back in and kick butt!

Today the sun is out (finally), Corrine Bailey Rae was playin' in the car, I was wailing along with the windows down and my shades on, quite frankly Mr Shankly- life is starting to look up!

Sink or swim?

Last week I lost something.

I lost something that I didn't ever really have, if only for a brief couple of days.

I was enticed, by Hope.

She was standing on an island and I was on the sand, white, brilliant sand.

In front of me was sea, crystal clear, blue sea.

I put my toe in.

The water was so warm, so inviting.

Hope was there, shining a light and beckoning me to come toward her.

Slowly I swam.

I swam those crystal waters towards Hope, towards her light.

After a short while, the water began to feel colder, not the same as it did on the shore.

I hesitated, but reminded myself that often seas feel colder when you get in deeper.

Gradually a light mist surrounded me.

Through this mist I was struggling to see Hope.

I could just make out her light, but it was faint.

Then briefly the mist lifted and once again I saw Hope and her light.

But all too soon, she was gone.

The mist was thick, heavy, it engulfed me and sucked at my soul.

Panic set in, I couldn't reach the bottom of the sea, my feet trod the water and I floundered in the unknown.

Behind me I heard voices, on the shore.

I turned and swam heavily and with cumbersome strokes, flailing often, toward the voices.

Hands reached in and grabbed me and dragged me up on the the rocks and pebbles that were once pale sand. As they did, the rocks cut my arms and my face and my legs.

The sea water stung my body as deep reminder of my journey, just as the tears later stung my face.

My womb felt empty, my heart heavy.

The voices asked me if I was okay.

I was devoid of any emotion, I could not reply.

Looking behind me back at where Hope once stood, I could now make out her island.

Millions and millions of pieces, made up from women's hearts.

Shining, red and bright, on the precipice of this isle.

And standing out like a star on the horizon,

Was a tiny, new, fresh slice of mine.

Jollies and Gin Trollies!

I am getting a little too good at this hiatus thing! This could be in part due to being uber busy at the moment and not having so much time on the 'puter to blog the banal, or it could be due to the fact that I am losing my leetle grey cells again.......as it appears there is a small bun in the oven sucking them dry!

We have just returned from an ........interesting.......trip to The Bahamas. I say this as we were on a mission there to renew our visas, the choice of destination wasn't a choice for a holiday per se, merely the better of other choices outside the US for one week that spoke English, wasn't five hours ahead and wasn't 35 below! and after all, who can complain about being forced to the warmth of the Carribean for a week?

As I have said before, holidays are for the mad, the childless and the desperate. Queues, lost luggage, delays, missed flights, living things sharing the same bed at night (and this is after Mr Beehive and all small Beehives), cancelled trips AND mislaid visas, not much more one could pack into a week really!

Nassau, we felt, was a little "Marbella-ish" - but perhaps that is just our hidden snob popping its nose out or a sign we are heading towards the wrong side of 40 rather than the right side of 14!

It was riddled with cruise ship visitors and many, many spring break teens all delightfully drunk and loud, supping yards of beer from containers designed to match their own overbaked skin (I am sure I was never like this, nor will my children ever be....off to pop my head back in the sand!). Puke stains decorated the corners in strategic places and even the sellers in the straw market looked pissed off and too tired to barter! For the "other-end" of the market, there was Paradise Island where one could mingle with the likes of TomKat and Oprah, spend a night at The Atlantis Hotel in the $250,000 per night suite overlooking the cruise ships, drink Marguaritas on the locals' floating gin palaces or ride in helicopters to shop for extortionately priced diamonds and other bling.

But moans aside (which, were they to happen singularly, we would have just laughed at, but altogether does appear somewhat of a conspiracy!!) it was semi relaxing, very warm and pretty enough. The boys and I managed to feed sting rays and see a wild sea turtle (that was the highlight of my trip. I have seen one before, in Sri Lanka, it rode alongside our boat for a short while, but it never ceases to fascinate me when I see wildlife in its true habitat, particularly rarer creatures such as turtles!). Mr Beehive, however, saw more of the inside of the American Embassy than he would care to remember.

New Providence has some glorious parts, the outer islands and the sea itself, the coral reefs (a diver's paradise!) and some secluded beaches here and there, but there is a need to seek the rose amongst the thorns . We won't be returning in a huge hurry.

Seize the "teachable" moment!

Every so often in the Beehive we have a weekend that just needs to be written off!

This weekend was that one!

On Friday at school I was part of a group of parents participating in a Health and Sexuality talk with a nurse. In a very large nutshell, it was about how we can teach our children about sex, puberty, self esteem and the likes. It was an good conversation and I came away with some excellent info, the most important was the ceasing of "teachable moments".

Saturday was the first of those such moments. Not related to the topic by any means, but early evening saw Master Beehive the elder and younger fooling around (as so often happens after dinner); remember the "witching hour" when they were babies? Well believe me, that continues for as long as they are children, manifesting itself in different ways and in my household, that becomes the "mad half hour". Children running wildly around in all different directions and doing all manner of things - fueled by fuel in fact - whoever said that children's behaviour deteriorates when they are hungry hasn't been in The Beehive after dinner of an evening!!!!!

I am chatting with Mr Beehive in the kitchen whilst needlefelting my gnome (nah! not as rude as it sounds, think voodoo but with an end product - the stress relief is G - R - E - A - T !!!) when I hear a tinkling sound. You know when you hear something, you know exactly what it sounds like but your brain refuses to register that this is what it could possibly be because, if it is.....well that would mean the inevitable has happened........and that couldn't possibly be so - or could it?

Apparently yes!

Mr Beehive the younger comes running through to say that Master Beehive the elder has put a baseball through the window. You know, STILL not registering (and I haven't even had a drink!!) I am SOOOO slow on the uptake, that it is not even in my radar that he is telling me that his brother has just broken the lounge window with a baseball!!??!!

Suddenly the realisation hits and the red mist comes down.

I storm through, see the evidence and send him forthwith to his room telling him I will deal with him when I have calmed down. Recalling an example in a book I read a while back, perhaps Life with Boys or something similar, where a dad talks about the exact same scenario and how he deals with it with his 11 year old, I decide to draw on this and go up to calmly talk to him. Together we come up with a suitable reprimand, in this case, some of his pocket money to help pay for the repair (this is the one thing that hits him hardest!) and discussing the fact that his dad and I are not upset with the fact the window got broken as it was an accident and yes, he didn't mean to do it, but more that he was irresponsible and was playing with a hard ball inside the house.

Anyway, cutting a looooooong story short. This morning I am awoken by whispering and swiftly attaching my extendable-mummy-ears catch on that he has just charged his poor brother $10 for the priviledge of entering his room!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Seriously if it wasn't funny, I could have swung for him. He was dutifully ordered to return the toll!

So, teachable moment number one!

Teachable moment number two came on Sunday at breakfast time. Sitting down to scrambled egg we got onto the topic of the chicken and the egg and the fact that they lay eggs and we don't have eggs.

"But we do!" says I

"Where? We are mammals!" asks MB the younger

"Well mummy has eggs, like a bird really and they need fertilising with a seed before they become a baby"

Mr Beehive looks ominously at me! Ignoring his look, I am empowered after Friday.

MB the elder says

"Daddy has the seed"

"There you are!" I say, gleefully ! Woohoo that was easy!!

Silence

More silence

Then

"Well alright but how do the egg and the seed get together?"

Mr Beehive smiles a kind of smirking smile, the kind that says - ha ha now you did it!

"Sex," says I............

Thus endeth the second teachable moment!

So what with an abundance of teachable moments, and a childbirth class at school that found me on the floor of the school music room with a large blue ball between my legs (make of THAT what you will!) this weekend only had to end with one of them falling sick.

Poor lamby LMB! She is flushed and hot and feeling decidedly sick. I returned from the class at school to find her asleep on the sofa and since then she has been in the sling as I try to cook the dinner.
-
-
-
-
-

Which the bogging dog ate the left overs of, so now I have to think of something afresh for dinner tomorrow night. Something that doesn't involve ANY teachable moments methinks!!!

Golden Potty Awards!!

The worst parent of the week award goes to...........



.................drum roll...................................



ME!


This afternoon LMB was somewhat desperate for the toilet. Why is it that girls who are desperate to go to the loo, leave it until the last possible moment, until that point whereupon their move from their strategic crouch on the floor will open the floodgates and send pee everywhere? Hopping from one foot to the other, she had managed to remove her dungarees (I know, very helpful for her, but these are the only ones she owns and she loves em!) but was wailing for help. Feeling compassion, I hoiked her up onto the seat just in time. I handed her some toilet paper and left the room, calling behind me to remind her to put her clothes back on.

"But I am wearing my knickers mammy."
"Wow, that was quick!"

I turn back to check and see her still poised on the porcelain pot and glance at the crumpled dungarees on the floor. I return back to sorting the washing in my bedroom.

"You haven't you silly thing, they are on the floor. Are you tricking me?"
"No mama, I have my knickers on"
"But I put you on the pot......you can't have your.......... knickers............. on.........(*shiiiiiiiiittttt*)"

Realisation dawns, I leg it back to the bathroom to see her sitting forlorn, still on the toilet, trying to desperately remove her sodden undies, toilet paper in hand!

I expect she is now scarred for life!!

Mum's day / Dad's day

When I teach my childbirth and parenting preparation classes, sometimes I do an exercise called Mum and Dad's day, highlighting the importance of communication in the early days of parenting and how easy it is to misinterpret something that you don't see in reality.

So, I think I need to re-introduce this exercise into my own life:

Mum's Morning

6.15 Get up check state of hair and make decision not to wash it as there won't be time, have quick shower. Turn on computer to check e-mails later in day. Throw on clothes, fling hair into ponytail. 6.25 Go downstairs to breakfast chaos to find no Mr Beehive, LMB has poured milk into the apple sauce, Master Beehive the elder and younger are both gnawing on chocolate chip granola bars for breakfast and the dog is howling in the yard. Start by clearing up and reprimanding the boys for poor choices. Re-set the table and put on wellies to go and get the dog in before he wakes the neighbours. Toast bagels for the boys' lunch boxes and intercept argument about who stands on the stool to get in the way and then following fight with Mr Beehive the younger pulling the Little Miss off the stool by her feet! Get milk for Master Beehive the elder who has suddenly developed an accute inability to walk, remove empty orange carton from fridge and replace with fresh open one. Make bagels to discover no lunchboxes. Send boys to retrieve lunchboxes from school bags. Wash both boxes hastily and dry them manically, debating the second most important use for my hairdryer in a crazy household. Remind boys to choose their fruit, close their boxes and put them back in their bags. Load dishwasher. Clean table, clean children, supervise teethbrushing (a little too late)...........clean bathroom (!) Open curtains in various rooms, remove Mr Beehive's snack plate/wine glass from previous night. Open bathroom window as it smells like a duck's crack. Find Master Beehive the elder's school book behind the toilet. Pick up Master beehive the younger's glasses and hat strewn on the dining room floor. Continue up the stairs, meet Mr Beehive looking clean and dressed and unstressed coming out to pretend to be interested in the dressing process. Snarl at him, he retreats back into the bedroom and half heartedly tries to help me make the bed which I deliberately re-do around him to prove that it is too late trying to help when I AM ACTUALLY DOING IT! Put two baskets of clean washing on the bed to remind me to sort it into piles later for putting away. Make children's beds, open curtains, help LMB choose something to wear, chivvy along Master Beehive the younger. Retreive another library of books from down the side of Master Beehive the elder's bed. Wave off Mr Beehive, clean my teeth, put on slap, help LMB re-dress as she got to the loo too late. Print off important stuff for meeting this morning, remember I still haven't done the preparation for work on Thursday and write myself a list. Get sidetracked by the need to change as the Little Miss gives me a hug holding a purple crayon and draws on my jeans and then sidetracked further trying to trace the cause of a disgusting smell, finally realising that it is a dirty diaper that LMB did for me this morning at 5.30am which has been left in the bathroom. Give kids a 10 minute warning to get on socks, sweaters. Give 5 minute warning.
Go downstairs make sure lights are off, put on coat, collect together lunchboxes and bags and leave them on the stairs for boys, lay out coats. Notice that the laundry basket has been put in the kitchen and immediately get my hackles up feeling irritated that Mr Beehive thinks I need to know the washing needs to be done (*insert eye rolling emoticon!) Kick the basket!
Spend the next 15 minutes chasing Mr Beehive the younger into actually getting his stuff on and getting out of the door into the car. Little Miss in the meantime is down the garden, playing in the mud! Re-dress LMB for the second time this morning, check my watch, panic as we will be late and Master Beehive the elder will get a tardy mark and then blame me!!
Finally get all children into the car at 8.15 ready for school.
Get to school and realise I have left the photocopies on top of the pile of washing to be sorted in the bedroom!

Dad's morning:
6.10 Get up and go downstairs, pick up newspaper on way to bathroom. 6.20 Emerge sometime later. Put radio on loudly. Check blackberry. Empty dishwasher, wash up few items with back to children. Presume they are making breakfast, but can't hear or see them, still, think what a nice surprise that will be for Mrs Beehive! Check blackberry again. Take dog out to yard. 6.25 Come in and go upstairs. See Mrs Beehive has put on computer, go on few websites and download stuff to ipod. Shave, Clean teeth, take a nice long warm shower, style hair, cut toenails, dress. Notice Mrs Beehive isn't happy when she comes up, feel confused, help to make bed, pick up laundry basket on way downstairs to leave by machine to help Mrs Beehive. Get coat, briefcase together, check blackberry one more time before arriving at the office. 7.10 Say good bye to children and the wife, leave. Arrive at work, have coffee, settle into day!


Perhaps I should devise the "nine years later" game for my classes??!!

Diversion

Today's post can be found here http://www.athomewithmontessori.blogspot.com/

Oh and here is Master Beehive the younger after playing a game this afternoon with his brother called "You've got to be kiddin' me". This was apparently a forefeit!

Making sense of it all!!

Finally the finished dress!!

I think the Little Miss approves, which is great news!!

I start at the Waldorf on Thursday this week. This may all seem somewhat of a change of allegiance, but I have always felt that for the early years ie: birth - around 3, Waldorf is a wonderful environment for children to be in, so it isn't, I am as reinforced as ever about Montessori.

The group I am running is a parent and toddler group and we all work together in the room, making bread, doing handcrafts and observing the children, allowing them the freedom and independence to join in by first observing themselves and then participating. We also play games in a circle and share a snack together.

To me, this isn't too dissimilar to the Montessori environment that my children then moved onto bar the presence of the parent. I have often felt that this wonderful nurturing, parent-secure environment that is created for the first two or so years at the Waldorf, neatly merges into the need of the child to move onto more independence away from the adult and thus lies the prepared environment in the Montessori. I realise this is over simplistic, but I feel that there is some complement to these two very different educational methods as well as some very different ideas too.

This weekend I completed "The Silent Journey" at the Montessori. We spent the time observing all the classes (Toddler, Primary, Lower El, Upper El and the Middle school) in silence, reflecting on our observations. The second part of the weekend was spent being shown and being given the opportunities to use the materials in each of the rooms. It was a very humbling experience. I felt like I was almost being shown something forbidden as there was this strange sense of awe and almost loss looking at things that I had no idea how to use and then, after being shown how the tools produce the formula or results etc, having that real "a-ha!" moment! I have to say, I am actually envious of the opportunities the mini Beehives have at that school!

So returning to my original point about the morphing of Waldorfian ideas with the thoughts and philosophies that Maria Montessori had, I really feel that the idea of parent supported groups for babies through the time they would begin a toddler program, for me working in the Waldorf environment, neatly includes the need for attachment, the need of the child to observe the parent, the need to explore and be curious in a safe environment, the use of simple toys and the stretching of the mind, emphasis on sound and voice and a natural prepared environment.

Waldossori?? Not sure that anyone would buy it!

Mad Dogs and Englishmen

Crisp, sunny, winter day, what better thing to do than go to the playground and burn off some energy?

Only, not if it is 21F with a windchill of 18!!!!

One of my less intelligent ideas was carried out yesterday with LMB and Master Beehive the younger. Master Beehive the elder was on his way back from a camp-in at the Boston Science Museum with Mr Beehive, so I decided we needed "out"!! All children were suitably dressed in attire that would put the Michelin man to shame whilst I, in my infinite wisdom, decided that "clothing was for wimps" and donned merely a couple of sweaters and scarf, pair of gloves (and trousers too natch!) and of course, the obligatory shades, but no jacket or hat.

Such a nice day, let's go to the playground at the beach right?............. WRONG!

The playground at the beach has the wind at the beach and the wind at the beach comes gusting across the Sound at the beach. On pulling up at the playground, I notice lack of other human beings and excitedly tell the children they have the whole playground to themselves..........of COURSE they do, what other nutters would be out in this weather.............well, other than one family..............who were British.

As we all sat in the small pocket of sunshine drinking hot chocolate from a flask and eating ginger biscuits......we were the united front of English eccentricity.........you would have been proud of us!!!!!!!

On warming up my dead fingers, I managed to finish these next two projects which I am pleased with. LMB loves her new funky flares, and my sewing machine simply adores his new quilted cover (bastard, like he needed to smugly share that info with me after I had sat at the beach in the freezing cold!!!!)

Today we were going to make some bread for lunch as we are off from school, but last night the oven decided enough was enough! After ten years of service, he decided to bow out with a somewhat spectacular fireworks display running around the lower element! I think my slow cooker is going to step into the spotlight this week until the new kid arrives!

Oh and finally, I have a new job!! Just an itty job that fits in perfectly with my schedule. I will be running a parent and toddler class one morning a week at the Waldorf school at the bottom of the road! I can hardly call this work, making crafts and baking bread with lots of friends each day.....pah, I have such a tough life!!!

Saturday project

It is amazing what you can do with a spare couple of hours, some remnants of fabric and a pair of cheap jeans.....

My new toy arrived the other day and I have been itching to try it out. My head is spinning with all the ideas I can finally put into practice, so here is the first one which came to a total cost of $7.00 to make, yes, that included the jeans from the consignment store!!

My next project is the first of a few very early Christmas presents- bugger the January sales now - and then I am going to attempt a summer dress for LMB. Watch this space....

Anyone for knitted yoghurt?

In response to an e-mail received this week:





"I must have a word with you about this knitting obsession though - who knows where it could lead. I should hate for you to become lanoline dependant, spending increasing amounts of time sniffing and touching in wool shops and driving around the state in search of sheep to hug finally ending up in the gutter and throwing your life away. I think you should begin by putting a strict ceiling on the number of patterns, pairs of needles and balls of wool you have in the house at any one time. I will, however, give you a huge tip about the types of garments you should be creating for T, W and I (and more importantly R!!). You need to know that knitted swimming costumes, regardless of the quality of the wool or craftmanship, don't work. Please don't put them through the embarrassment of emerging like Persephone from the foam with a ton weight of 4-ply clagged round their knees and ankles suspended on flimsy shoulder straps. NOT attractive."






I wanted to have the opportunity to respond and say that I was not intending to make Mr Beehive too many horizonally striped sweaters with his initials on the front or knit too many all in one jumpsuits for my salsa dancing, gym manic mother. The thought hadn't even crossed my mind to think about bathing suits however, now there IS an idea............so


Frances - This one is for you:

I guess you don't want to hear about the arrival of my latest toy then???

The Frog Prince

Remember the scene in "The one with all the Thanksgivings" in Friends?
This was my own little Joey this afternoon!!





What a nutjob!

Am having a bit of a writer's block at the moment. I hope to be fully recovered in the next couple of weeks so ..........put on the kettle, but don't go anywhere!!

The Business of being Born

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4DgLf8hHMgo

Finally!

Look at the faces of the docs when asked how often they get to see a natural birth - they look like they don't even understand the question for a second!!!

Out of Hibernation

Early this morning, sometime around 6am, Mama bear was awoken by the padding paws of Father bear crossing the den toward the "great outdoors". Sleepily she snuggled further down in her nest pulling in baby bear closer for warmth, content that her other cubs were still snoring peacefully. The gradual light from outside the den was evidence enough that hibernation was over........at least for this year!!!

The first morning back after the holidays always feels like a huge shock to my system. This Christmas we haven't had any visitors and so have been just the five of us, hunkering down in front of the fire most afternoons, playing board games or watching movies, or, in my case, knitting*. We have only ventured out for essential supplies (yes knitting needles were one of these essentials!), to go to "Stew Lemons" as LMB delightfully calls it (well daddy does this place - I can't stand the shop!), to attend a badly run NYEve party for the kids when we should have remained home (perhaps this hibernation period has made us particularly choosy over the types of things we head out for??) or to walk the dog. It has been great fun! Mr Beehive has been off work for a whole week and a half - nearly the longest we ever have him home at any one time.

It hasn't all been fun and games however, Little Miss Beehive and Master Beehive the younger (primarily, but with his older brother joining in for good measure now and then) have been at loggerheads on several occasions that has had me ready to pack up and leave home, we have had WAAAY too many games of Star Wars for comfort (Mr Beehive has been even been drawn in to "feel the force" on occasions and I have lost count of the times we have been subjected to "Mary Pottums" by her #1 obsessed 3yr old fan aaggghhhh!!!

*With regards to my knitting, that I took up last winter as a curiosity or loosely termed hobby more than anything else, it has become an obsession!! I have finished one dress for LMB and nearly a cardigan this holiday and the sweater I started for MB the elder is in its last stages omg! I am already slavering over my next project (a cute hat with pigtail holes for my niece!) and the sordid thoughts of rolling around on the knitting shop floor on piles and piles of beautifully handspun, dip dyed alpaca wool........ahhhh the thought!! Mr Beehive, despite approving of my safe and sometimes wearable craft, is amazed that the cost of a button these days! It isn't my fault, the shop lures me in, sucks my inner soul (and my credit card), my good sense and feeds me patterns that say "simple", "easy", "any numptey can do this one" and then the profur these gorgeous bamboo needles that feel so ooooohhh! and the wool - ahhhh! - don't even take me there - I think I have moved over to the dark side, perhaps I should start trusting the force too?? - but it may be too late for me!! (of course, this obsession will only be understood by a fellow knitter - to all others of you I will appear like some crazed, unhinged person with an unhealthy attitude to playing with sheep offerings!!)

Now we are in a new year - funnily enough it doesn't feel any different to the last one so far, but there is nothing like an opportunity to tweak a few imperfections or have a good clear out of stale stuff, not that I am one for resolutions anymore, they don't tend to get much further than the 4th before they are broken or in serious disrepute!

So my only New Year's resolution this year is to not have any resolutions then I can't fail!!

However I do wish you all the largest dose of health and happiness throughout this year!!!!!







Yours 2008ishly
The Beehive

Raindrops on Roses and whiskers on kittens...........

So what were YOUR favourite Christmas gifts this year? Did you secretly love the sweater that Great Aunty Mo knitted for you in lime green with a picture of a cat on the front? Or that 9785 piece jigsaw of your front lawn in full greenery? Or how about that really great book on Ineffective Political Leaders of our time in all its 4,000,000 pages!!!!!!!

In the Beehive there are really few rules as to what makes a good gift, most of them set by me:

1. it occupies said person for more than 10 seconds
2. it lasts with said person for more than 10 seconds

Simple really!

Ours particular faves this year were*:

Master Beehive the elder - his Lego City that has kept him and his dad amused since about 1pm on Christmas day (I love pressies that amuse both child and dad!! you really feel like you are getting your monies worth - there should be a government health warning on the side though - buy this gift and lose two family members for around 12 hours!!) We have a few more pressies that fit this category that we have lined up for the next few days in order to give mama time to knit or go to the gym and burn off that Christmas dinner!

Master Beehive the younger rather took to a bug catcher with a wonderful, battery operated suction facility. Even though there are no bugs to catch at this time of year, he has thoroughly enjoyed "catching his sister's hair" and sucking up little bits of grime to show me during mealtimes!!

Little Miss Beehive was particularly taken with a pack of Charlie and Lola playing cards - "I am ever so honestly playing a game of flip flop mammy, even though I really truly and completely haven't got a clue what I am doing!!" This too has kept her amused for quite some time.

For me there was a nice, lush black scarf from my mil (chosen by me however hee hee!) and an espresso machine from dh (which might be apparent from my jibbering post today!) I was also the delightful (erk! Should read delightED - but perhaps I am delightful too???) recipient of a beautiful piece of jewellery - I think he might have actually been sucked in by the adverts !! I just hope I manage to keep this piece where it is meant to live (around my neck!) rather than lose it somewhere into oblivion in my parent's ensuite!!

I feel a little sorry for Mr Beehive the eldest of all olds, as I bought him a couple of replacement sweaters (he has had a sweater cull recently!) because his actual present was a trip to Vermont earlier in the Fall. There ain't no easy way to wrap that up, oh and he has a daily present of ................. ME!

So now we are moving to 2008...........I wonder what the year will bring? Hopefully for all of you a happy, healthy and wonderfully fun year.

Mwah x

*disclaimer - this is not to say that ALL presents received this year were not wonderful, of the best thought and love and we are very, very grateful THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!